I’m thinking of changing my name to Surrounded by Incompetence. Just think, I could walk up to anyone at work and say, “Hi, I’m Surrounded by Incompetence.

I could do it. Hollywood divas and various music artists do it all the time. Madonna, Beyoncé and Prince have all changed their names for one reason or another. P. Diddy…er…ah…Diddy is in some kind of club where he gets frequent-name-change discounts. (No, really! Here’s a video.) Prince did it as a slap in the face to Warner Brothers because he felt no one would be able to pronounce the symbol that was his name.

I want to change my name for another reason too: Employees are getting fired for bad-mouthing fellow employees on personal blogs and web pages, and I work in an industry where a certain amount of venting is necessary for sanity’s sake.