Kids say the darndest things, and Emily is the darndest kid. It’s remembering the things that they say that is the hard part. We’ve managed to keep most of the true gems here on McClellandfamily.com and we’ve finally gathered them all into one post for your enjoyment…

After running naked through the house (at age 2) ending up straddling the gap between the couch and the coffee table with her bottom up in the air, Emily proudly said, “Look Daddy, I’m a bitch.” We later surmised she meant ‘bridge.'”

At age 2, while pointing at a map of the North American continent, Emily explained, “This is our house. And this is America Online.”

About the lights on the football field at the local highschool (at age 3): “I like lights on buildings, because without them you wouldn’t be able to see all the beauty in the world.” (Click this photo to see a larger version.)

While driving home from daycare at age 4, Emily pointed down every cul-de-sac we passed and said, “Don’t go that way daddy. That’s a dead side.”

At age 4, after being accused of being tired: “I wasn’t yawning, I was just letting some fresh air into my mouth.”

While driving in the foothills (at age 5): “If we call these foothills, can we call the little trees ‘foot trees?’”

On why wearing her locket reminds her of others in the family (at age 5): “The picture of Sara inside reminds me of Matt because he’s Sara’s brother. And that reminds me of Beth because she’s his mom. And that reminds me of Robert because he’s Beth’s husband. And that reminds me of baby Lauren because Lauren’s scared of Robert.”

On how to make the world a better place: (At age 5) “If all the people in the world were nice could we just get rid of the word mean?”

“Divorce is when mommy and daddy yell at each other then they spread apart. Then they put up a ‘for sale’ sign in front of the house and they spread farther and farther apart until they can’t come back ever again and it’s very sad.” This at age 7 while teaching her 4-year old brother.

Emily apparently hasn’t said anything noteworthy since age 7.